NEW BLOG ALERT

Hey everyone! Jake and I just created a new blog at j-cvellinga.blogspot.com

Feel free to switch over and follow us there :) Happy day to you all!

What is "normal" life anyway?

Hey, hey, hey! So, I know I promised pictures and posts about my many adventures, but have yet to find the time to do so. In the end the pictures are much more fun for me to see than anyone else, though if you'd like I can perhaps show you a few by request :). Or, if you feel like doing a bit of facebook/blog stalking, Erika has posted pictures of all the spots we went on her blog and on facebook, so have at it!

Now perhaps you're thinking "If you can't find time to post pictures, why are you writing on your blog at all?" That is an excellent question! Well, I shouldn't be writing here at all. I have a lot of homework to do....I mean a lot. By June 2nd I have....dun dun dun....
17 papers to write
6 interviews to type up
8 questionnaires to translate and transcribe
300 pages of reading
and 2 interviews with BYU staff.

And it'd be nice to find a job in the process of all this work, so that come June 2nd there will be something left in the job market other than snow cones....though now that I think of it, I know that will be gone too. Snow cones are probably WAY up there on the fun scale. Mmm....I could go for a snow cone right now.
So now you're thinking "WOW, you're still here?! Get to work girl!!" Here's the kicker, I've been sitting here trying to write for awhile now, and the only thing that's coming are conversation-like ramblings or rantings from a girl who's a bit stressed out. That's what brought me here, because I'm thinkin' I need to get a few things out and off my chest before any of the writing is going to happen, or if I ever expect my mind to stop wandering and focus on what I'm reading.
Here's what's on my mind then. Re-entry culture shock!!! I thought I was past it, actually I kind of stopped thinking about it altogether, only to find out that I am still struggling. To everyone it seems as though I never left, and in the past couple of weeks I've kind of felt that way too. And yet I did! I lived in Romania for four months, where I fell in love with nine children, five roommates, co-workers, branch members, and a culture. I was happy there, it was challenging and new, and I learned a lot about myself. Now of course there's nothing wrong with that. I think what I'm really struggling with at the moment is trying to bridge the gap, to be the person everyone at home knows me as, while holding onto all that's new and good that came from the past five months (and much longer than that if you count preparation. Romania has been my focus for a long time now). The predicament pretty much has me stumped! I know I've said this a thousand times, but I'll say it once more. Poor returned missionaries, they must experience all of this times six (24 months vs. my four) but I bet it feels like this times 1,000. I'll figure it out eventually, but here I am with almost three full weeks of being home under my belt, and not much to show for it as far as emotional stability (or homework.....). I think I'm ready to go back now, but at the same time I'm really not.

The other thing that's been on my mind is the fact that I had a big disappointment this morning. I auditioned for Pirates of Penzance at Hale and it was the biggest crash and burn I've ever experienced at an audition. So, looks like no show for me this summer which I'm really bummed about. It's ridiculous actually, when did I become so shy? It's like I was a turtle and I just drew back into my shell the moment I stepped in that room. I had a friend tell me the other day "Oh Camille, I'm sure you'll do awesome. You're Camille Porter!" and thinking back on that now makes me chuckle. I am Camille Porter, just a slightly different one. Still trying to figure her out completely actually. It's been too long since I performed, I'm way out of practice and it showed in every possible way at my audition. Oh well, guess everyone needs to completely bomb an audition once or twice in life! But even so, it was quite the bummer.

On a much happier note, I spent this past week in California watching my niece and nephew! They may just be two of the cutest kids ever... I may be a biased aunt though....but no even then they're pretty much the cutest ever. Ethan is a handful though, he kept me busy and my respect for mothers continues to expand. Anyway, Cindy and I drove there, conquered the LA freeways, and spent a week together the majority of which was without internet (that made the homework situation tough). It was a fun week, though the fun was definitely lessened by the dark cloud of things to do lingering over my head the whole time. I love the beach too, oh boy is that a wonderful place :). And I LOVE Cindy Clawson. That girl is just...oh don't even get me started on all I love about her. We had lots of fun!

And last of all, one of my closest friends was married yesterday!! Liz Larsen is now Liz Sorenson, it's official! After staying up 'til three or so making a wedding video for her, I woke to Liz coming in my room for a chair at 6:15 am for hair and makeup (No, I did not do her hair, I can't even do my own haha). It was an early beginning to a long, but very fun day! Everything turned out great, and it was so fun to see her as a bride and be with her throughout her day. Emotional? Yeah, but like always, I couldn't be happier for them, they are perfect for each other.

Well, I think this brings my random post filled with all that's on my mind to a close. Hope you made it through all that without wanting to throw something or take a bathroom break. "Party in the U.S.A" just came on shuffle...I remember feeling SO excited about really partying in the U.S.A. but man I miss dancin' with the girls in our tiny apartment in Iasi. So strange that only a month or so ago I was there. Wowzers. Ok I'm done, off to see if something other than random thoughts like these will flow out of my fingers :) Let the "All Homework and Nothing Else (except for some job hunting) Week " begin! Oh yeah, and I lose my teenage status that week too, but no time for any focus on that. La revedere!

28 hours of flying later....

Guess what, guess what, guess what?!?! I'M HOME!!!!!! And boy is it wonderful.

You know, traveling is awesome and it has been an absolutely incredible experience to see everything I have in the past week or so. Yet, after all of it, I can't even tell you how great it is to be with my parents again, and talking to all my family and friends! Turning on my phone again, weird! And entering an airport where everything was in English... oh it was neat, and crazy. Culture shock much? YES. But I don't mind one bit, I was definitely ready to be home. After giving my parents and Brian and Ally the biggest hugs I could muster, I slept for oh, 10 hours? I saw my mountains today, and held my hand out an open window while wearing a seat belt (yes, funny that it would make me so happy to have a seat belt). I saw an American flag flapping in the wind, and was just giddy :).
Give me a few weeks or so and I'm sure I'll be ready to be back in Romania (I miss everyone there so much...), but for now the comforts of home are all I can ask for!

In case any of you were left off the band wagon (which is basically everyone but my parents...) we quickly threw together a trip and still got to do some backpacking!

So, beginning in Frankfurt we went to.....
Munich
Rome
Florence
Venice
back to Frankfurt
and finished in Paris!!

It was quite the trip, and I'll hopefully have time in the next little bit to post at least a few pictures and things from each place I visited. But for now, I'll be focusing on catching up with many of you in person :) because I can now!!! I've been home for one day, and I've started losing my voice a bit from all the talking, and I'm loving all of it!

Germany!!!!!!

Hey! I'm first! Erika hasn't posted yet! Had to relish in that fact...for those of you who don't understand, Erika is a very good blogger, and many of my family and friends have resorted to her blog at times for an update. BUT NOT TODAY! :)

We are both happily in Frankfurt, with the wonderful Ninow family. We bought tickets for a 28 hour train adventure on a whim yesterday, with the idea that at the end, we would be in Frankfurt which was a lot better than the unsurety of the planes these days. Our awesome plan worked, and we're here! Boy was it a relief to see the Ninows waiting for us at the train station, we were gross and tired and they took us right in. We're thinkin' we're going to just stick around in Germany, traveling from city to city seeing the sights here instead of hopping countries like the original plan included. If there's one thing for certain, it's that there is definitely plenty of great things to do here. The train ride was long, but actually extremely beautiful. I mean, EXTREMELY beautiful.

Anyway, this is short and sweet. Thought I'd just fill all y'all in (Erika just informed me how to correctly write that) (yes she's sitting over my shoulder dictating parts of my blog post) (I STILL WIN!)

Cu drag!

Yup, still here!

So, relaxing was nice, that's true!

But we quickly lost our sanity...

Only to be saved by some very nice elders,

and a trip to one of my favorite places in the whole world!

I went to church in a full out chapel for the first time in four months! And it was all still in Romanian!! I thought I'd said my last goodbye to church (and the hymns) in Romanian, but there I was. I was pretty much in heaven. Not to mention the fact that our lesson was on Joseph in Egypt and how he turned the irritations in his life into blessings. We all chuckled at how it was all so perfectly directed towards us. I'm truly blessed to have a Father in Heaven who understands me. Because, really I wouldn't say this has reached the full status of a "trial" or "affliction" really. Though the sight of the eruption is intimidating, I'm no where near it and I'm comfortably sitting in a hotel room chatting with family and friends. It's just a major irritation and frustration that our long awaited plans to see so much have been foiled. But, as our sweet primary teacher taught us (that's right, we were in primary because it's taught in English with all the Americans haha) that it's all about our attitudes towards those irritations in life. So I didn't get to go to Paris, Italy, Prague, or Switzerland...I suppose worse things have happened and maybe I will get another chance someday. There are some real pros to being here in Romania still. I've realized (though it was absolutely no surprise) that I really am not ready to be done with Romania. Then again, I'll probably never be. And though I'm turning a tiny bit green with jealousy that one friend of mine is still back in Iasi with all our friends, I am grateful to be where I'm at because reopening all of that would be tough. Saying goodbye once was hard enough. I suppose I'll never be done with Iasi, or Romania, so I'm glad for the chance to hold onto it all a little longer.

The drive back to the hotel after church was great fun!

Every fountain had been dyed red in honor of "Hemophilia Awareness Day"...random.Here we have the "Arc de Triumful" of Romania. A little fun surprise on the drive, Romania's own version of the famous Arc in Paris...glad I got to see at least one!

Isn't it just beautiful? Spring is definitely the best season of the year. While leaning over Erika to take this picture, she said "Camille, you always take pictures of the most random things!" My response: "LOOK at those flowers, and the green grass! How is that random at all?" I love all of the green everywhere, and wish I were closer to the city so that I could explore and go to the awesome park we passed.

Anyway, we were also kindly fed dinner by an American family we met in the branch who have been living here for a few years. We ate such wonderful, American tasting food. RANCH DRESSING! And Oreos...oh happy day. They were so kind to us, and their kids were a ton of fun. I did have to stop myself multiple times from talking to them in Romanian though, seems as though I'd forgotten how to talk to kids in my own language haha. It sure was nice though at the same time. The whole night was a lot of fun, and the entire day I was so grateful to have friends anywhere in the world that I may be stranded.

So, until further notice I am still in Bucuresti just trying to get the soonest flight out! We've accepted the fact that our five country backpacking trip is no longer a reality, and now are just focusing on getting to Frankfurt, where a good friend's family is ready to take us in. If all goes well we should be on a plane there tomorrow afternoon! Of course, the chances are still high that won't happen...and the 36 hour train ride it would take to get us there doesn't sound too inviting either. Plus, who knows if we could even book a train?

Icelandic volcano...what in the world?! Crazy sauce. European travel is a battleground at the moment, I'm grateful to be here safe in a hotel with my friends!

Wait for it.....

Remember my earlier wish of not having time to post? Well, looks like I'll have plenty....

This was the lovely sight we were greeted with as we got the airport once again (the shuttle driver from the hotel knows us well, he laughed when he saw us waiting for him yet again). So, looks like we're not going anywhere until Monday, along with everyone else (except those going to Tel Aviv, I'm ready to backpack, we should have just taken that one!). And even Monday is up in the air. I should be in Paris right now, but I'm keeping it positive, I just took a really great nap :) My least favorite part of it though? Our friends at British Airways were no longer able to accommodate, because it's no longer their responsibility. So no more free hotel rooms, and the three of us decided to cram into one. PARTAY!

Erika's face is awesome... Man, a volcano. In Iceland. This is insane!!! Signs of the times, so I guess I shouldn't be so surprised but WOW!

I'm leavin' on a jet plane...train...nevermind.

Hello everyone! Wow have things been crazy or what? This past week has been insane, saying goodbye to the children, all my awesome friends, and then the city/langauge/everything I've grown to love about Romania was...rough. I never like goodbyes, and as our train pulled away from my new home in Iasi, I'm sure I was quite the ridiculously sad sight. Not to mention the fact that I was trying to eat a cold shaorma (an amazing Romanian sandwich I'll tell you all about) while struggling through my tears. I miss Iasi like crazy already.

Yet, right as I've come to grips with the fact that I'm leaving Romania, and got a chance to really get excited about our 17 day backpacking trip, it seems that Romania isn't ready to say goodbye to me yet. Due to recent events in Iceland (what?!) I'm still here! They've shut almost all air traffic to northern Europe down and we are now enjoying free meals and accomodations from our friends at British Airways who have booked us a direct flight to Paris today. Cross your fingers! In four hours I should hopefully be on my way, but there is still a definite possibility I'll be here in Bucuresti even longer. I should have been in Paris right now, getting ready to go meet our friend Jen (our other friend we're traveling with) at the Arc de Triomphe. Crazy stuff! I know it will all make a really funny story to tell for the rest of my life, and I'm SO grateful for the rest I've been able to get here. Now I'm just really, really ready to roll! So anyway, thought I'd give you that little update on things! Pray that I get out of here soon!

P.S. If you haven't already learned this trick, Erika Peterson's blog (which you can find a link to on the right, it's Livin' the Dream) is very well updated unlike mine. She posted a few pictures and a funny video of us in the airport that you can go look at! I love this girl, we're going to be connected at the hip for the next two weeks and I love her to death. Enjoy, and hopefully I don't get any more time to post before I'm back in the states MAY 2nd!!!!!!!!!!!

An Ode to Vanner

Hello again everyone! Wow, it's been probably too long since I last posted...but my time here is quickly running out and I'm trying hard to focus on really making my time count instead of being quite as diligent on keeping in touch. Hope you can forgive me. I'll be home soon enough with TONS of stories to tell. This last week and a half have been...incredible. Seriously, every single day here is different...a new adventure with another story to tell, even if it's a story of an overwhelming wave of sickness that through the power of the priesthood is healed. Those memories are just as important to me as the ones of the small town I visited, or the baby goat I held, and the sweet old women who kissed and overfed me. And I'm only going to keep racking up the stories, as this week I'm off to Moldova! But before that I get to spend more time with some of the most wonderful little kids in the world, and see some beautiful monasteries. And after that? Oh boy, then I get to spend an entire week between the capitol of Romania, as well as a city filled with mountains and waterfalls and relaxation for six tired girls. I get to go HIKING! The only downfall to all of that is that I will miss 5 whole days with the kids. I'm trying hard not to think about how soon I will have to leave them, that will be yet another trying experience. I spent 2o minutes today having my hair brushed by a lego as I held the hand of a tiny toddler trying to walk and sang to the boy in the wheelchair who was holding my other hand while my co workers chuckled at the funny American girl. How could I not be in heaven? And yes that was a run-on sentence I know. Meh.

And you know what else? I know I've only been here for a few months, and that I don't live a life hardly at all like what the missionaries do, but I really do feel like I understand why they act so funny when they come home! The idea of returning to normal life again, just weirds me out. Where not much has drastically changed in a few short months, and yet, I have changed. Maybe not drastically, but enough to make going home feel a bit strange. Anyway, I'm rambling once again, it seems to be a talent of mine that certainly hasn't left me.

So there's the short (that always turns... not so short) update on my life for you!
As for the rest of the post, I started this post a while ago and am only just now finishing it. It is, my friends, an ode to one of the best vehicles to have ever existed.


This is for you Vanner, you may be the only '87 Toyota Van who ever had an 18 year old girl cry over you as she said goodbye. You will forever be a part of my childhood, and I will always think of you as I see others all over the world....

Good to know you can find vans like this in Romania too! I know that my family and friends will agree that Vanner held a lot of good memories and I can't help but smile every time I see one.

Vanner and I, we had some seriously good times....

So, there's my "Ode to Vanner." Feel free to leave comments on your memories etc. Those would be fun for me...and feel free to update your blogs or write me because I still love any news from home! Until next time (which might be a couple weeks) hope you're all well.

Va iubesc!

Finally a little more like...me.

Primavera frumoasa!

Primavera frumoasa is the first day of spring, which we celebrated on Monday here in Romania. The fresh market was jam packed that morning as we went with so many others in the city to get flowers for special people. The flowers were beautiful and the feeling in the air was so...springy! Which just happens to be one of my favorite times of the year. This week was also the week building up to the big day, March 8th which is Ziua Femeii (Women's Day) and it's really the Romanian equivalent of Mother's Day here. Those flowers above are the culmination of all of the flowers given to each of us girls and every woman in the branch today. We (the girls here) also gave our own little gift by singing "E Ziua de Mamico" for all the branch members. :) It's a fun little mother's song, feel free to have a listen to this poppy version if you'd like!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xsueWarCmg

Needless to say it was a wonderful day at the branch!
As for the rest of this week....well I did a lot of this...

Yup, I fell asleep at a church activity...toilet paper and all. I also did PLENTY of this...

Yes, I did in fact get hit hard this week with something bad. It all started on Monday with a scratchy throat and has gone in a bell curve that I'm still definitely in. Wednesday was the peak, and I missed two days of work at Section 2 (which bothered me more than any nose blowing or coughing). Wednesday was pretty horrible, I was completely out of commission. What did I do that day? I watched three movies, slept, and took a very hot bath. I'm thinking the sickness came from a number of things.
1- stress
2-the sudden change in the weather. It's been beautiful and warm for weeks and then that all changed in a flash!
3- sickly children
4- stress.
Since my "recovery" and return to work on Friday, things have been a slow uphill incline. I did get to go out yesterday for some yummy Romanian food!

...Ha apparently Abby didn't think it was so yummy. That same night we huddled close together to withstand the cold while waiting for a tram Saturday night at 10:00 pm :). Man it was COLD!


So...I've sat and debated what to write for this week's post a lot...and had some misgivings as to what I should actually put down. I don't want to pour all of my heart, soul, and personal experiences onto here because, well, those are personal for a reason and this is the internet. That being said, I feel it's important to share how I really am with my close family and friends who read this, and I'm also eager to share my thoughts and growing experiences. It's tough to find the middle ground. But my sister Lisa recently posted something that was more than just the "we went and did this..." and I've read it many times, grateful for the chance to hear a little more intimately how she's feeling at this stage in her life. I loved it sis :) and I've chosen to follow her lead (which has never taken me in a wrong direction yet...don't even get me started on how blessed I am to be the youngest in my family). So with that introduction, consider yourselves warned, and be prepared for a lot of feelings!

For some time now, I've had a tiny identity crisis building inside of me. That all came to a head this past week, especially when the sickness hit because when I feel weak and sick, I feel it in every aspect. For weeks I've felt frustrated with what my role is here. The things I'm known for at home, those things that make me me seem to be different or at least feel different here. Am I here to serve the kids I work with? Yes! Yet every day I struggle as I witness their trials and attempt to make any difference I possibly can for them. In the end I recognize that it's more what they do for me than what I can do for them that will make the largest difference. Yet, the fact that I feel so helpless, lacking in the skills and the permission to truly make a notable difference in their lives has weighed down upon me more than I ever thought it would. Each day is different, I never know what to expect and neither do they. One day I'll have time to play and cuddle and teach. The next I hardly can get two minutes of quality time with any of them. The things I've seen, the heartbreak I've felt as I've been forced to look away as they cry and struggle with their own loneliness has left an imprint on me like nothing ever has before. I do my very best, but so often I don't feel like it's even close to enough, and that has caused a lot of frustration. I have no doubt that the stress I've felt from my constant struggle at work was a major factor in my crash in health this week.

Am I here to learn and grow from my roommates and the friends I'm making here? Yes! But this also has added to my small identity crisis, because in my constant focus to see the good in others I suppose I haven't done so well at finding it in myself as well. It's very easy for me to see only my faults. And I suppose I've struggled with feeling unique, feeling like I have something truly my own to offer others... which sad to say may be tied to my pride. I know it sounds crazy! But I'm just trying to put into words the things that I've recently realized have been weighing me down. Constantly working to bridge gaps and accommodate differences seems to have tired me out a bit and maybe even suppressed my true self (which is my own fault, I know).

So, overall I guess I've missed the things that make me ME, because I've felt very disconnected from myself if that makes any sense at all. On Friday night I finally snapped out of this weird mind set I've been in, and reconnected with ME and I've felt so happy ever since. What happened Friday night you ask? I stayed home while the rest of the group went to see Alice and Wonderland at the mall. It was the first time I'd ever been alone in the apartment, and apparently it was exactly what I needed to "find myself" again. I spent two glorious hours cleaning the kitchen while singing to my show tunes, followed by homework and Julie Andrews :)

Yes, I did in fact watch "The Sound of Music" all by myself, and it was the perfect thing to pull me back together. Just look at her! I completely lost myself in the movie. I laughed, cried, and sang along and loved every minute of it. Cheesy? YES! But it made me so incredibly happy. I finally felt like ME again.

Now I'm no Julie Andrews (not even close), that is NOT my real hair, and I have yet to visit the Alps...but I feel very content to be me, here having my own little European experience. It's obvious that I'm happiest when I'm being myself, with the people I love...
And doing the things I love...

Yet, it seems I need to learn how to be that happy even when all that is so far away. There are no campfires in Iasi, only cigarette smoke. And those that I love and who give me strength are so far away. It's easy to be an optimist when life is a breeze...can I call myself a true optimist when things are different? That is the question, and I feel as though I can now say, 100%, YES!

The challenges of life are such a blessing, I feel so grateful for all that I'm learning here, even if it's the fact that I'm re-learning how to be myself. Being here in Romania gives me daily opportunities to be completely out of my element, to challenge my strength of character in so many ways. I made one of my favorite purchases yet the other day...4 lei (the equivalent of about $1.20)...and the cutest little thing I ever did see. It's a book of poetry by Anne Bronte, and it's about two inches tall...in other words heaven for me. In it I found a poem, that I've read so many times now. It may just be my favorite ever...I can't help but share it with you all and I hope you enjoy it as much as I do :) And yes, it's long but definitely worth it!

Oh, Youth may listen patiently,

While sad Experience tells her tale;

But doubt sits smiling in his eye,

For ardent Hope will still prevail!

He hears how feeble Pleasure dies,

By guilt destroyed, and pain and woe;

He turns to Hope and- she replies,

‘Believe it not- it is not so!’

‘Oh, heed her not!” Experience says,

‘For thus she whispered once to me;

She told me, in my youthful days,

How glorious manhood’s prime would be.

When in the time of early Spring,

Too chill the winds that o’er me pass’d,

She said, each coming day would bring

A fairer heaven, a gentler blast.

And when the sun too seldom beamed,

The sky, o’ercast, too darkly frowned,

The soaking rain too constant streamed,

And mists too dreary gathered round;

‘She told me Summer’s glorious ray

Would chase those vapours all away,

And scatter glories round.

With sweetest music fill the trees,

Load with rich scent the gentle breeze,

And strew with flowers on the ground.

But when, beneath that scorching ray,

I languished, weary, through the day,

While birds refused to sing,

Verdure decayed from field and tree,

And panting Nature mourned with me

The freshness of the Spring.

“Wait but a little while,” she said,

“Till Summer’s burning days are fled;

And Autumn shall restore,

With golden riches of her own,

And Summer’s glories mellowed down,

The freshness you deplore.”

And long I waited, but in vain;

That freshness never came again,

Though Summer passed away,

Though Autumn’s mists hung cold and chill,

And drooping nature languished still,

And sank into decay.

Till wintry blasts foreboding blew

Through leafless trees and- then I knew

That Hope was all a dream.

But thus, fond youth, she cheated me;

And she will prove as false to thee,

A thousand ills will oft portend,

That Providence may ne’er intend

The trembling heart to bear.

Or if they come, it oft appears,

Our woes are lighter than our fears,

And gently, gently die away

Chilled by the damps of truth!

Tell him, that earth is not our rest;

Its joys are empty frail at best;

And point beyond the sky.

But gleams of light may reach us here;

And hope the roughest path can cheer:

Then do not bid it fly!

Though hope may promise joys, that still

Unkindly time will ne’er Fulfil;

Or, if they come at all,

We never find them unalloyed,

Hurtful perchance, or soon destroyed,

They vanish or they pall;

Yet hope itself a brightness throws

O’er all our labours and our woes:

A thousand ills will oft portend,

That Providence may ne’er intend

The trembling heart to bear.

Or if they come, it oft appears,

Our woes are lighter than our fears,

And far more bravely borne.

Then let us not enhance our doom;

But e’en in midnight’s blackest gloom

Expect the rising morn.

Because the road is rough and long,

Shall we despise the skylarks’ song,

That cheers the wanderer’s way?

Or trample down, with reckless feet,

The smiling flowerets, bright and sweet

Because they soon decay?

Pass pleasant scenes unnoticed by,

Because the next is bleak and drear;

Or not enjoy a smiling sky,

Because a tempest may be near?

No! While we journey on our way,

We’ll notice every lovely thing;

And ever, as they pass away,

To memory and hope we’ll cling.

And though that awful river flows

Before us, when the journey’s past,

Perchance of all the pilgrim’s woes

Most dreadful shrink not ‘tis the last!

Though icy cold, and dark, and deep;

Beyond it smiles that blessed shore,

Where none shall suffer, none shall weep,

And bliss shall reign forevermore!

None shall suffer, none shall weep... I'm here doing all that I can, and doing my best to love every minute of it. To notice every lovely thing and feel joy in all that I possibly can. It feels wonderful to have reconnected, to know even more surely that I'm in the right place, learning what I need to learn to progress on my own path. It feels good to completely feel like ME again :)

P.S. I didn't really CRY while watching The Sound of Music ok? I wasn't quite that far gone...it's just an expression alright? Good, glad we have that all cleared up :) Have a great week!